The Kids are Alright

...And I am, too.

The last two days we've been celebrating Brodie's 1st birthday! It's been fun, although slightly stressful, and the birthday girl (and her brother) had a blast. A lot of family was able to make it to her party, which was really nice.

So far, as far as the tumor and all goes, the kids have been told as much as they can understand and seem fine with it. Benjamin's first comment was the inspiration for the blog name. I was nervous about telling him about the tumor and the doctors visits and hospital stay that are too follow, since his only exposure to those things have been through Grandpa, and I don't want him to think I'm going to die anytime soon. I did feel like I needed to tell him something, though, because obviously he would know something's up when I'm suddenly going to the doctor a lot.

A day or two after my ER visit I was sitting with him at breakfast and said "Guess what, buddy? You know how Mommy went to the doctor the other day? Well they took a picture of the inside of my head and it turns out there's something in there making Mommy have a headache!"
"Like a bug?!"
"Yeah, kind of like a bug."
"Can I see it?" :)

Every few mornings he asks if my 'bug' is still there and tries to look in my ear (he can see it! :P). I've told him that it's okay because the doctors have medicine (he obviously doesn't understand surgery) that will make the bug go away and mommy will feel better. He doesn't seem upset by it and actually has asked his cousins before if they want to look in my ear and see the 'bug'. So it's not exactly accurate, but it's good enough for a three year old.

Brodie of course doesn't understand, being a baby, but there are unfortunately consequences for her, too. I was hoping to breastfeed her until around 18 months, assuming she would be more or less disinterested at that point anyway. However, knowing that I'll be in surgery all day, and in the hospital a few days, I figured it would be better to try to wean her now. Afterall, how embarrassing would it be asleep in the middle of surgery and all of a sudden my hospital gown is all milk-stained from not feeding her all day? (Haha, sorry, hope that's not TMI. Working on mother-baby unit with breasts and babies all day, it doesn't phase me!) She seems to be okay with it so far, but it's disappointing for me.

I'm still doing well. Actually today I didn't take any tylenol at all, and only drank one coke. I'm going to have to try to back off on the coke since I've been getting some chest pain that is apparently stress induced, but made worse with the caffiene. I can't win!
The other morning the kids were being bad and stressing me out, I almost yelled out "I'm coming, Elizabeth!"

Supposed to hear from the ENT and other neurosurgeon Monday for appointments. We shall see...!